Toddlers and Weddings
So let me just begin by saying who doesn’t want that perfect picture of little people dressed up and smiling in their wedding photos? Everyone wants that but realistically hardly anyone ever gets that!
It is normal to want the flower girl, the ring bearer, your own children to be part of your special day. Hey, I even promote doing Unity Sand with your children. I too love seeing children being part of the big day!
Let’s just look at the reality of it though. Toddlers attention spans are very small and the time allotted by them to attention is usually focused on something they really like to do or something all about them. I’m thinking your wedding doesn’t fall under either of those categories in their little minds.
Let’s break it down into age groups....
If they are 8-15 months you are getting a 1 min attention span.
If they are 16-19 months you are getting a 2-3 min attention span.
If they are 20-24 months you are getting a 3-6 min attention span.
If they are 25-36 months you are getting a 5-8 min attention span.
If they are 3-4 years you are getting a 8-10 min attention span.
If we were to be honest the Wedding Day these little guys and gals are involved in doesn’t just include the 15 minute ceremony. It involves rehearsal the night before, adults decorating late, then the big day of getting ready, getting pictures AND the ceremony along with limited needs being met because let’s face it Wedding Days/weeks are crazy busy! As adults we are able to, for the most part, suck up the hunger, exhaustion, uncomfortable clothes, heat, etc., etc., not so easy for a toddler to suck it up. While all these busy adult things are happening what do we give these little ones to just shut them up realistically whatever the heck they want which usually involves some form of sugar and/or dye which has just lowered that attention span from the highest to at the very best the lowest time allotted for their age! Then we want these little people who are uncomfortable, tired, cranky, hungry and likely hopped up on sugar to behave like good little angels for the wedding ceremony. Maybe, this is the first time in their lives we have had any behavioral expectation on them whatsoever. So we want them to go from do what ever you want to angel mode and just maybe we are shooting too high!
My suggestions are:
- Have your children or someone else’s children in your wedding but don’t have high expectations on them.
- Bring small toys they have never seen before and let them hold them during the ceremony.
- Prep healthy snacks and treats for the day before and the day of the wedding. This small step could eliminate a lot of extra crazy and stress. Cubed cheese, crackers, cubed chicken, raw veggies and even some cubed fruit, grapes just 1/2 cup of fruit though. Give them a water bottle that has water and ice in it so it’s cooler than straight up water.
- Even though it’s tempting for connivance sake to let them eat whatever avoid the sugary treats (this includes juice) until after the ceremony and pictures.
- My only other suggestion is really just a joke....Gravol.
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