This is something I’ve never addressed in my 54 years on the planet but Christmas was fiercely depressing growing up. Our mom had a horrible past that brought depression over the holidays. Her unresolved trauma caused so many layers of sadness and stress it was impossible for it not to rub off on us. So last month when my sister (1or2 of my siblings left on my mom’s side) said “it’s hard this time of year isn’t it!” I was so excited to hear it wasn’t just me. That I wasn’t alone, with struggling to keep my head above water, was so very reassuring. That I have to force myself to decorate, wrap, bake and participate in Christmas. If we were taught anything grown up it was to never discuss the hard stuff. So in 2023 me 54 and my sister who is 14 years my senior had never once mentioned this to each other.
Let me just be perfectly clear I am 110% aware that I am blessed with so much. That even while you are reading this you are probably listing things and people you know I’m blessed with. And trust me I am thankful for all of them.
That said if I was to unpack my younger years, my crazy existence and my compound loss you would likely see why sadness grips me occasionally. Why I can sometimes hold joy in one had and have sadness spilling out of the other hand at a drop of a hat.
My survival technique is to stay busy enough that I am able to ignore my sadness.
What happens when you have Dec 23-Jan 2 off you make a plan to be busy. Then Dec 23 comes and brings with it a fierce chest cold that makes you unable to do anything but sit in your feelings, by yourself for several days in a row.
You’re not going to talk about your feelings. It's hard to admit to family and friends that at such a wonderful time of year you don't actually feel wonderful at all. You’re sad.
All the strategies you’re typically told to use when you’re feeling blue kind of get lost when you’re feeling blue, sick, are contagious and it’s Christmas.
You’re not doing anything to keep yourself busy.
You’re not asking for help.
You’re not keeping in touch with anyone.
You’re not eating well.
You’re not getting out in the sun.
I can tell you 4 days in and it isn’t pretty. I had several breakdowns today. The thing is I never want to burden people with my issues so I bottle them up until they erupt.
But what if the fact that I feel this way and survive year after year encourages someone else that they can make it through? What if me saying I’m going to get up tomorrow morning and be ok. I’m going to get up and count my blessings. Makes someone else say I’m going to try that? What if my struggle helps you with your struggle just knowing you’re not alone, makes a difference.
Then I guess it is ok to share the hard stuff.
And to those that got crazy mom or Michelle in the last few days…. Sorry, I love you and I’m thankful for you.
”Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.“
Grief is a natural response to
losing someone or something that’s important to you. We often have a plethora
of emotions; my main ones are sadness or loneliness. Years will pass and you
think "I’m good, I got this" but there are times when you aren’t so good and you just ache to
be the same as everyone else.
For me it is
in the joyful times.Times like weddings,
showers, graduations, proms, baby dedications etc.The time when everyone else’s family is
around in a big way and you’re left feeling like the odd one out.You’re lonely because your mom, dad, siblings,
nephew, sister-in-law have all gone on.In the day-to-day busy I miss them from time
to time but can hold it together for the most part. That said when occasions are coming where
everyone is going to be celebrating, I begin to break down. I try to hold myself together through the
event because it's not about me and I am truly happy whatever the occasion. That said, I’m often found crying at anything and everything the week prior and
the week following, I'm just raw. Why, you wonder,
because these occasions remind me of the deep loss I have and how much I truly miss my extended people.
Occasions where there is only room for “family”
means I have nobody extended to bring.There is no room for my now new extended family (AKA friends) because
they aren’t related to me. I don’t have anyone to celebrate my kids with me
anymore and it breaks my heart.So, if
you see me tearing up at something joyous or you think I'm a bit off don’t think I’m not happy for whoever is celebrating. I am happy, I’m just a bit lonely for those who gone on
before me. I miss having someone to share in the joy with me. And if I'm totally honest I feel awkward. Everyone else has many extended family members to celebrate with them and there's Michelle, by herself.
So, this is my loss journey sometimes I'm doing pretty darn good, other times I'll break if you say something in the wrong tone because I'm super sensitive during festivities.
I know I'm not alone in loss we all live with loss every day but if anyone out there can relate to this and it makes you realize you're not alone in your "loss emotions" then I'm glad I shared.
Blessings,
Rev Michelle
“Like a
deep sad note
played beneath the ocean
waving through the orb
the memories of you
the bittersweet echoes
infixed forever in my heart”
― Pawan Mishra
It's been a while since I publicly preached so I'm going to pre-warn you I'm a little rusty. My outline for my sermon was from a 3 part series on loss preached by an amazing man of God, Brian Huston, Global Senior Pastor of Hillsong Church & President of Hillsong Music, Hillsong Channel & Hillsong College. My half hour doesn't compare to his hour and a half of preaching you can find on the Hillsong Channel, Going Further: The Power Of Loss -Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3.
Sunday, March 10, 2019
POWER IN LOSS
I WOULD LIKE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT LOSS THIS MORNING ABOUT POWER IN LOSS
LOSS HAS THE POTENTIAL TO STOP US FROM GOING FORWARD & FURTHER IN GOD IN OUR EVERYDAY LIVES.
LOSS HAS LIKELY TOUCHED EACH ONE OF US HERE THIS MORNING. WE HAVE ALL STRUGGLED WITH GRIEF AND LOSS. IT’S PART OF THE JOURNEY OF LIFE. LOSS COMES IN SO MANY FORMS;
LOSING A LOVED ONE,
THE UNIMAGINABLE LOSS OF LOSING A CHILD,
RELATIONSHIP LOSS, BE IT A RELATIONSHIP YOU THOUGHT WAS GOING SOMEWHERE BUT YOU WERE BROKEN UP WITH,
DIVORCE,
UNFAITHFULNESS OF A SPOUSE,
LOSS OF A JOB, LOSS OF FINANCES BANKRUPTCY,
LOSS OF DREAM
ETC., ETC., ETC.
LOSS OF TRUST, LOSS IN A DIVORCE, LOSS OF A JOB LOSS OF FINANCES BANKRUPTCY CAN BRING SUCH A LOSS OF CONFIDENCE AS WELL!
HEBREWS 10:35 TELLS US SO DON’T LOSE YOUR CONFIDENCE. IT WILL BRING YOU A GREAT REWARD.
CONFIDENCE IS A REWARD. IF THE ENEMY CAN STEAL OUR CONFIDENCE HE WOULD LOVE THAT. LACK OF CONFIDENCE CAN LEAD TO A LOSS OF HOPE.
FOR MYSELF PERSONALLY, I HAD 3 YEARS OF UNIMAGINABLE LOSS. I LOST 3 SIBLINGS AND MY TWO PARENTS. I HAD MARRIAGE STRUGGLES THAT WERE A HUGE LOSS. I HAD A LOSS OF A JOB THAT I HAD FOR 8 YEARS BECAUSE I HAD SO MUCH OTHER LOSS IN MY LIFE. I WASN’T ON TOP OF MY GAME AND BY THE TIME I WAS GETTING BACK TO 100% THERE WAS REALLY NO GOING BACK. IF I ALLOWED MYSELF I REALLY, REALLY COULD HAVE GOT STUCK THERE. I COULD OF LET IT BREAK ME.
BUT…
PSALM 71:14 HAS BECOME MY THEME OVER MY LAST 3 YEARS OF ASTRONOMICAL LOSS!
NO MATTER WHAT, ”AS FOR ME, I WILL ALWAYS HAVE HOPE!”
HEARTBREAK IS REAL,
DISAPPOINTMENT IS REAL,
GRIEF IS REAL
BUT DON’T LOSE HOPE. WHAT THE ENEMY WOULD LIKE US TO DO IN LOSS IS STOP. STOP US FROM GOING ANY FURTHER. ROBBING US FROM ALL GOD HAS FOR US. HE WOULD LIKE TO PARALYZE US.
WE HAVE TO MAKE THE CHOICE THAT LOSS WILL NOT DEFINE US. THAT WE ARE NOT STOPPING AND GETTING STUCK IN LOSS. LOSS MAY GIVE US A LIMP FOR THE REST OF OUR DAYS, WE MAY WALK A LITTLE DIFFERENTLY AND WE MAY ALWAYS FEEL THE PAIN. BUT LET US TODAY DETERMINE THAT LOSS ISN’T GOING TO DEFINE THE CONDITION OF OUR SPIRITS. THAT IT ISN’T GOING TO GET THE BEST OF US. WE WILL NOT ALLOW THE ENEMY TO BRAND US DAMAGED GOODS.
LOSS IS A PART OF LIFE IT STARTED AT THE FALL AND WON’T END UNTIL THE TIME COMES TO PASS IN REVELATION WHERE IT SAYS THERE WILL BE NO MORE DEATH, NO MORE LOSS, NO MORE CRYING, NO MORE SORROW, NO MORE PAIN. UNTIL THEN LOSS IS A PART OF THE WORLD WE LIVE IN.
LET US LOOK AT THE BOOK LAMENTATIONS, IT’S ACTUALLY A HEBREW WORD FOR LOSS. IT'S-A LAMENT. JEREMIAH WAS LAMENTING THE LOSS OF JERUSALEM, THE LOSS OF THE TEMPLE THAT WAS IN RUINS. THE LOSS OF ALL THEIR DREAMS, THEIR FUTURE AND THERE HOPE.
IF YOU TAKE THE CHARACTERS IN THE HEBREW IT SPELLS OUT H-O-W THAT IS HOW LOSS LEAVES US FEELING…
HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN TO ME?
HOW COULD GOD DO THIS TO ME?
HOW COULD LIFE BE SO CRUEL TO ME?
HOW CAN I KEEP GOING ON FROM HERE?
HOW? HOW? HOW?
BUT RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THIS GREAT LAMENT JEREMIAH SUDDENLY HAS A TURNAROUND A SWITCH IN CONFESSION
LAMENTATIONS 3:22- 24 THROUGH THE LORDS MERCIES WE ARE NOT CONSUMED BECAUSE HIS COMPASSIONS FAIL NOT. THEY ARE NEW EVERY MORNING. GREAT IS YOUR FAITHFULNESS, THE LORD IS MY PORTION SAYS MY SOUL, THEREFORE I WILL HOPE IN HIM.
MY LOSS IS NOT GOING TO BE WHAT I DWELL ON EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY NIGHT IT’S NOT GOING TO EAT ME UP AND CONSUME ME FROM THE INSIDE!
YES, WE ARE FACING LOSS BUT WE WILL NOT BE CONSUMED BY IT.
THE APOSTLE PAUL SAYS IN 2 CORINTHIANS 4:19 STRUCK DOWN BUT NOT DESTROYED
WE MIGHT FEEL STRUCK DOWN THIS MORNING BUT BE ASSURED WE ARE NOT DESTROYED.
THIS WILL NOT DEFINE THE REST OF OUR LIVES, GOD HAS MORE FOR US AND WE WILL NOT STOP HERE. LET’S HAVE THE SPIRIT OF JEREMIAH. LET’S HAVE A TURNAROUND.
I MAY BE CONSUMED FOR A MOMENT BUT IT WILL NOT DEFINE THE REST OF MY LIFE!
WE MAY HAVE SEASONS OF WEEPING, CRYING, PAIN, DEATH, AND LOSS BUT NO MATTER HOW LONG THE NIGHT FEELS NO MATTER HOW GREAT THE LOSS HAS BECOME WE NEED TO REMEMBER
PSALM 3:5 WEEPING COMES IN THE NIGHT TIME BUT JOY COMES IN THE MORNING
LET’S THINK ABOUT THE SEASONS
WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW IN OUR “SIX MONTH” WINTER HERE IN SUSSEX, NEW BRUNSWICK WE HAVE HAD A REALLY LONG HAUL. I FEEL LIKE THIS IS BEEN THE LONGEST WINTER WE’VE HAD IN A LONG TIME! WE SEE PEOPLE POSTING THEIR TRIPS TO SOMEWHERE WHERE THERE IS SUMMER AND WE JUST WANT TO DELETE THEM UNFRIEND THEM. TELL THEM THAT THEY CAN TAKE THEIR SUNSHINE AND HEAT AND GET LOST!
SOMETIMES IT HARD WHEN YOUR GOING THRO LOSS TO REJOICE WITH THOSE WHO ARE REJOICING.
BUT SERIOUSLY THOUGH….
IT ALL STARTS WITH FALL. THE SEASON OF LOSS & DYING. THE TREES LOSE THEIR LEAVES AND IF YOU HAPPEN TO HAVE A SWIMMING POOL OR PAVED AREA YOU SPEND A LOT OF TIME CLEANING OUT THE RESIDUE OF FALL. THE RESIDUE OF LOSS AND THAT’S PART OF LIFE.
WHAT COMES NEXT IS BLEAK, DEAD AND DARK AND THERE SEEMS TO BE NO LIFE. EVERYTHING SEEMS TO HAVE DIED. EVERYTHING IS COLD. EVERYTHING IS GONE AND IT SEEMS LIKE NOTHING IS HAPPENING.
MAYBE YOU’RE IN THAT SEASON RIGHT NOW BUT WHAT IS UNSEEN IS THE ROOTS ARE WORKING HARD, HARDER THAN THEY EVER DID BEFORE.
WINTER IS NECESSARY TO BRING NEW LIFE, TO BRING THE NEW GROWTH OF SPRING. THE RESURRECTION LIFE OF SPRING. I BELIEVE FOR EVERYONE HERE THERE’S A SPRING TIME COMING
AFTER DEATH THERE IS LIFE,
AFTER NIGHT THERE IS MORNING,
AFTER WINTER THERE IS SPRING
AND ULTIMATELY THERE’S A SUMMER HARVEST BUT IT ALL STARTS WITH LOSS.
WE CAN’T ALLOW OURSELVES TO GET STUCK IN WINTER. WE CAN'T ALLOW THE ENEMY TO PARALYZE US. WE CAN’T WITHDRAW OR ISOLATE OURSELVES. WHICH I PERSONALLY KNOW IS REALLY EASY TO DO. THERE ARE CERTAIN DATES AND OCCASIONS THAT ARE TRIGGERS FOR ME AND I WANT TO HIDE AND ISOLATE MYSELF. MOST DAYS I’M RUNNING TO AND NOT FROM. NOT ALWAYS THOUGH I DIDN’T GO TO CHURCH LAST MOTHER’S DAY BY GOD’S POWER I WILL BE THERE THIS YEAR. ODDLY IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT PEOPLE TO SHOW ME SYMPATHY AND CONCERN. MY MOM HAD JUST PASSED IN FEBRUARY AND IT WAS TOO SOON BECAUSE I FELT I WOULD BE A BASKET CASE AND I STRUGGLE WITH ALLOWING MY GUARD DOWN AND NOT BEING A ROCK IN PUBLIC.
THERE ARE TIMES WHEN WE WANT TO RUN FROM EVERYTHING AND EVERYONE WHEN WE REALLY JUST NEED TO RUN TO.
WHEN KING DAVID FACED DIFFICULTY AND PAIN HE WENT TO THE HOUSE OF GOD NOT FROM THE HOUSE OF GOD.
SOMETIMES THE LAST THING YOU WANT TO DO IS BE AROUND PEOPLE IN THE FACE A LOSS.
LOSS OF A MARRIAGE, LOSS OF JOB, LOSS OF FINANCES/BANKRUPTCY, LEAVES US FEELING EMBARRASSED! MAYBE EVEN DEPRESSED AND WE FEEL LIKE EVERYONE AT CHURCH IS LOOKING AT US AND TALKING ABOUT US AND WE START BELIEVING THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT US ANYWAY SO WE MIGHT AS WELL STAY HOME.
BUT IF THERE IS EVER A TIME WE NEED TO RUN TO THE HOUSE OF GOD IT’S DURING LOSS BECAUSE
THERE IS POWER IN THE COMMUNITY OF BELIEVERS
THERE IS POWER IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD
THERE IS POWER IN WORSHIP
THERE IS POWER IN HEARING THE WORD OF GOD!
AND WE NEED ALL THAT IN A TIME OF LOSS SO THAT WE CAN SURVIVE, SO THAT WE CAN HAVE THE POWER TO GO FORWARD.
THE ENEMY WOULD LOVE TO ISOLATE US HE WOULD LOVE TO PARALYZE US HE WOULD LOVE TO MAKE THIS DEFINE OUR LIVES HE WOULD LOVE TO MAKE US BELIEVE IT’S GOD’S FAULT AND NONE OF THE OTHER BELIEVERS ARE THERE FOR US. BUT BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY GOD CAN TAKE YOUR LOSS NO MATTER HOW PAINFUL AND TURN IT INTO POWER. I BELIEVE HE CAN & HE WILL.
I HAVE 4 POINTS TO GO OVER THIS MORNING THEY ARE FAIRLY SHORT SO DON’T PANIC!
1. WE CAN FIND GOD IN LOSS
IT WAS A SCENE OF TREMENDOUS LOSS WHEN JESUS DIED ON THE CROSS, IT WASN’T PRETTY! YOU CAN IMAGINE THE SENSE OF LOSS THE PEOPLE WERE FEELING, THE SENSE OF GRIEF, THE HEARTBREAK, THE OVERWHELMING PAIN OF LOSS THAT CONSUMED PEOPLE IN THAT MOMENT OF TIME.
JESUS KNEW IT WAS POWER. IT WASN’T AN EASY LOSS, LOSS NEVER IS.
HE SAID TO THE FATHER IF THERE IS ANY OTHER WAY TAKE THIS CUP FROM ME.
HE KNEW IT WAS POWER HE KNEW HIS LOSS ON THE CROSS WOULD BECOME POWER THROUGH THE RESURRECTION. HIS LOSS ON THE CROSS GIVES US THE POWER OF ETERNAL LIFE TO EACH OF US WHO CHOOSE IT!
MAYBE YOU GREW UP HEARING ABOUT GOD, MAYBE YOU’VE HEARD ABOUT HIM FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS SINCE YOU WERE LITTLE AND NOW YOU’RE OLD AND YOU KNOW GOD & YOU EVEN LOVE GOD. BUT IT’S IN TIMES OF LOSS THAT WE ACTUALLY SEE GOD!
WE SEE HIS LOVE, HIS COMFORT, HIS COMPASSION, WE SEE HIS MERCY, WE SEE WHO HE IS AND WHO HE WILL BE FOR US.
SCRIPTURE TELLS IN JEREMIAH 29:13 IF WE SEEK GOD WITH ALL OUR HEARTS THEN WE WILL FIND HIM. WHAT MAKES US SEEK GOD MORE THAN LOSS? I FEEL LIKE NOTHING. LOSS MAKES US CRY OUT TO GOD MORE THAN ANY OTHER HAPPENINGS IN OUR LIVES. IT’S IN LOSS WE FIND POWER THROUGH FINDING AND SEEKING GOD.
2. WE CAN FIND OURSELVES IN LOSS
I’M SURE WE ALL HAVE SOME KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMPOSER BEETHOVEN. HE SUFFERED FROM AN ILLNESS THAT WAS A RINGING IN THE EARS AND AT 28 HE HAD AN INCIDENT WHERE HE LOST ALL HEARING TEMPORARILY. EVEN THOUGH IT WAS ONLY TEMPORARY FROM THAT MOMENT ON HE WAS STRESSED AND HAD ANGUISH AND ANXIETY THAT HE WOULD LOSE HIS HEARING. LIKE JOB IT BECAME A SELF FULL FILLING PROPHECY. THE THING THAT HE FEARED STARTED COMING UPON HIM AND BY THE AGE OF 44 BEETHOVEN WAS STONE DEATH.
IM SURE HE GRIEVED, MAYBE EVEN FELT STUCK. MAYBE CONTEMPLATED GIVING UP. BUT HE WASN’T DONE. A DAY CAME WHEN HE STARTED WRITING MELODIES AGAIN. HE DIDN’T STAY STOPPED. HE FOUND HIMSELF IN THE LOSS. HE WROTE SOME OF HIS GREATEST MUSIC AFTER HE LOST ALL HEARING. HIS LOSS BECAME POWER AND HE FOUND HIMSELF AND WHAT HE WAS CAPABLE OF.
AND I BELIEVE LOSS CAN BECOME POWER IN OUR LIVES. WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT WE ARE CAPABLE OF THROUGH LOSS.
LOSS WILL LOCATE YOU THROUGH THE POWER OF THE HOLY SPIRIT. THERE’S MORE IN YOU THAN YOU THINK! THE STRENGTH AND RESOLVE YOU HAVE CAN CAUSE YOU TO RISE UP FROM THE ASHES. CAUSE YOU TO HAVE SOMETHING TO LIVE FOR. TO COMPEL YOU TO GO FORWARD.
LAMENTATIONS 3:19-24 I’LL NEVER FORGET THE TROUBLE, THE UTTER LOSTNESS, THE TASTE OF ASHES, THE POISON I’VE SWALLOWED I REMEMBER IT ALL. OH, HOW WELL I REMEMBER THE FEELING OF HITTING THE BOTTOM. BUT THERE IS ONE THING I REMEMBER AND REMEMBERING I KEEP A GRIP ON HOPE. GOD‘S LOYAL LOVE COULDN’T HAVE RUN OUT HIS MERCIFUL LOVE COULDN’T HAVE DRIED UP THEY’RE CREATED NEW EVERY MORNING HOW GREAT IS YOUR FAITHFULNESS! I’M STICKING WITH GOD I SAY IT OVER AND OVER AND HE’S ALL I’VE GOT LEFT.
RISE UP FROM THE ASHES. THERE’S SOMETHING TO LIVE FOR, SOMETHING TO PROPEL US FORWARD THROUGH THE LOSS! LET’S SEE WHAT IS IN US.
KEEP A GRIP ON HOPE, GOD’S LOYAL LOVE WILL NEVER RUN OUT.
3. WE CAN FIND PERSPECTIVE IN LOSS
LOSS CAN HELP US ESTABLISH TRUE VALUE. WE CHANGE AS WE START TO SEE WHAT’S TRULY IMPORTANT. WE START LOOKING AT THINGS IN LIGHT OF ETERNITY.
LOOK AT THIS UPSIDE DOWN WISDOM FROM SOLOMON IN
ECCLESIASTES 7:2 BETTER TO GO TO THE HOUSE OF MORNING THEN TO GO TO THE HOUSE OF FEASTING
HOW CAN A FUNERAL BE BETTER THAN A PARTY? HOW COULD THE HOUSE OF MORNING BE BETTER THAN A CELEBRATION?
THERE IS SOMETHING ABOUT THE HONOR THAT IS GIVEN TO THOSE THAT ARE GONE ON. TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU LOVED ABOUT THAT PERSON WHAT THEY WERE TO YOU WHAT THEY WERE IN YOUR LIVES. HOW SPECIAL THEY WERE.
IN TRUTH,
HOW MUCH THEY WORKED, THE CAR THEY DROVE, THE CLOTHES THEY WORE IS NEVER REALLY TALKED ABOUT BECAUSE IN LIGHT OF ETERNITY THAT STUFF DOESN’T MATTER.
WE GAIN PERSPECTIVE AND SEE WHAT’S IMPORTANT IN THE FACE OF LOSS.
YOU SEE THINGS DIFFERENTLY WHEN FACED WITH LOSS.
WE NEED TO LEARN TO DETACH OURSELVES FROM EVERYTHING THAT IS A LIABILITY EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING TO KEEP US IN A SEASON OF LOSS THE THINGS THAT DON’T REALLY MATTER IN ETERNITY.
THROUGH LOSS WE REALIZE WHAT REALLY IS IMPORTANT!
4. WE CAN FIND PURPOSE IN LOSS
WE CAN FIND PURPOSE IN LOSS THAT MAYBE WE DIDN’T HAVE BEFORE.
YES, WE MAY STILL BE LIMPING AND THE PAIN MAY STILL BE WITH US BUT THE LIMP CAN BE POWER BECAUSE WE HAVE MORE TO OFFER PEOPLE THAN WE DID BEFORE THE PAIN & LOSS. WE CAN RELATE TO AND TOUCH LIVES WE WOULDN’T OTHERWISE BE ABLE TO WITHOUT OUR LOSS. IT DOESN’T BRING SOMEBODY BACK BUT IF OUR LIFE NOW HAS MORE PURPOSE THEN THAT LOSS HAS BECOME POWER IN OUR LIVES.
-FIGHTING WITH MY FAMILY
SO I’M GOING TO TELL YOU STORY YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO JUDGE ME FOR IT! YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO THINK SHE’S CRAZY! WELL, I MEAN IF YOU ABSOLUTELY NEED TO YOU CAN. MY HUSBAND, MY DAUGHTER AND I WENT TO A MOVIE FRIDAY NIGHT CALLED FIGHTING WITH MY FAMILY. IT’S ABOUT A WRESTLING FAMILY FROM ENGLAND WHO WANTED TO MAKE IT BIG IN THE WWE.
THE OLDEST BROTHER TRIED OUT AND WASN’T SUCCESSFUL AND BECAUSE OF THAT LOSS HE ENDED UP MAKING SOME VERY BAD CHOICES AND BEAT SOMEBODY INTO A COMA AND WENT TO JAIL. THE YOUNGER BROTHER AND SISTER OF THE FAMILY WERE CLOSER IN AGE AND GREW UP WRESTLING TOGETHER AND DOING SHOWS TOGETHER WITH THEIR PARENTS WHO WERE ALSO WRESTLERS. SO BOTH YOUNGER SIBLINGS HAD A CHANCE AT WWE THE SISTER WAS CHOSEN BUT THE BROTHER WAS NOT. THERE WAS A SEASON FOR THIS BROTHER WHERE HIS LOSS WAS SO GREAT HE COULDN’T SEE WHAT HE STILL HAD LEFT, HE WAS RUNNING A WRESTLING SCHOOL IN ENGLAND, HE HAD JUST HAD A BABY & A PARTNER THAT LOVED HIM VERY MUCH BUT HE STARTED GOING TO BARS AND PICKING FIGHTS AND JUST IGNORING HIS FAMILY AND IT LOOKED LIKE HE WAS GOING TO GET STUCK IN HIS LOSS AS HIS OLDER BROTHER DID. THEN HIS OLDER BROTHER GOT OUT OF JAIL AND THEY WERE TALKING ABOUT THEIR SISTER MAKING IT. THE YOUNGER BROTHER SAYS TO THE OLDER BROTHER YOU COULD’VE MADE IT TO IF THEY WOULD HAVE GAVE YOU A CHANCE. OLDER BROTHER’S RESPONSE WAS NO I COULDN’T SHE HAD SOMETHING I DIDN’T. YOUNGER BROTHER ASKS WHAT WAS THAT. OLDER BROTHER YOU. AT THAT MOMENT THE YOUNGER BROTHER REALIZES THAT HE DOESN’T HAVE TO BE STUCK IN HIS LOSS THAT HE REALLY DOES HAVE A PURPOSE MAYBE IT WASN’T WHAT HE THOUGHT IT WAS GOING BE BUT HE KNEW HE HAD PURPOSE TO HELP PEOPLE. AND SO HE STOPPED BEING STUCK AND MOVED FORWARD WORKING WITH THE SCHOOL AND THE KIDS HE WAS TRAINING AND JUST INVESTED BACK IN HIS FAMILY. EVEN THE OLDER BROTHER APPEARED TO MOVE FORWARD FROM HIS LOSS. AND I THOUGHT WHAT A GREAT ILLUSTRATION OF NOT GETTING STUCK IN LOSS.
WE MAY NOT END UP BEING WHO WE THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO BE, WHAT WE THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO DO OR WHERE WE THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO BE.
WE MIGHT GO THROUGH A LOSS WITH THAT. WE MIGHT MOMENTARILY GET STUCK. BUT GOD HAS SOMETHING FOR US IF WE JUST LEARN TO TRUST.
MANY TIMES WE SEE PEOPLE WHO LOST A FAMILY MEMBER THROUGH THE ACTIONS OF A DRUNK DRIVER OR OTHER HORRENDOUS CRIMES BECOME ADVOCATES, THAT IS MAKING LOSS POWER. POWER TO HELP OTHERS WITH THEIR LOSS THROUGH YOUR LOSS.
WE OFTEN NOTICE OR AT LEAST I DO THAT WHEN WE HAVE SOMETHING HAPPEN IN OUR LIVES IT SEEMS LIKE THOSE PEOPLE WITH SIMILAR PROBLEMS ARE BROUGHT INTO OUR LIVES SO THAT WE HAVE THE COMPASSION AND THE ABILITY TO MINISTER TO THEM THROUGH THEIR TIME OF LOSS AND PAIN.
2 CORINTHIANS 1:4
HE COMES ALONGSIDE US WHEN WE GO THROUGH HARD TIMES, AND BEFORE YOU KNOW IT, HE BRINGS US ALONGSIDE SOMEONE ELSE WHO IS GOING THROUGH HARD TIMES SO THAT WE CAN BE THERE FOR THAT PERSON JUST AS GOD WAS THERE FOR US.
IN CONCLUSION PAIN, LOSS AND DEVASTATION IS PART OF LIFE BUT I BELIEVE THE BEST IS YET TO COME, AS WE GO FORWARD IN CHRIST.
PHILIPPIANS 3:13-14
I’M NOT SAYING THAT I HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER THAT I HAVE IT MADE BUT I AM WELL ON MY WAY REACHING OUT FOR CHRIST WHO IS SO WONDERFUL HE REACHED OUT FOR ME FRIENDS. DON’T GET ME WRONG BY NO MEANS DO I COUNT MYSELF AN EXPERT IN ALL OF THIS BUT I’VE GOT MY EYE ON THE GOAL, WHERE GOD IS BECKONING US ONWARD - TO JESUS I’M OFF AND RUNNING, I’M NOT TURNING BACK!
I'M NOT STAYING STUCK!
AS WE ALLOW THE LORD TO WORK THROUGH US AND HELP US TO MINISTER TO THOSE THAT ARE IN SIMILAR SITUATIONS, AS WE CHOOSE TO TRUST GOD AND NOT BLAME GOD, AS WE CHOOSE TO TAKE POWER OVER THE ENEMY AND NOT LET HIM PARALYZE US AND GET STUCK IN OUR LOSS. AS WE GO FORWARD AND NOT TURN BACK GREAT THINGS WILL HAPPEN.
KING DAVID FACED INCREDIBLE LOSS AND HE STILL SAID THINGS LIKE SURELY GOODNESS AND MERCY WILL FOLLOW ME ALL THE DAYS OF MY LIFE AND I WILL DWELL IN THE HOUSE OF THE LORD FOREVER. HE DECIDED NOT TO WITHDRAW WHEN IT CAME TO LOSS HE WASN’T GOING TO ISOLATE HIMSELF HE WASN’T GOING TO RUN FROM GOD. HE WAS GOING TO RUN TO GOD.
PSALM 27:4 SAYS ONE THING I HAVE DESIRED OF THE LORD THAT WILL I SEEK THAT I MAY DWELL IN THE HOUSE OF THE LORD ALL THE DAYS OF MY LIFE
RUNNING TO GOD IS ALWAYS THE ANSWER!
SO I CHALLENGE MYSELF AND YOU ALIKE FIND GOD, FIND YOURSELF, FIND PERSPECTIVE AND FIND PURPOSE IN LOSS. DON’T ALLOW IT TO STOP YOU, ALLOW IT TO PROPEL YOU FORWARD INTO GREATER THINGS! GROW IN LOSS DON’T STOP!
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